Fat Wraps

So I know, I've been slacking on here but I went boating with my sister and her boyfriend and all the kids on Friday and it totally wiped me out for the weekend. We were on the lake for a good seven hours and I got a beautiful scarlet sunburn. So I spent the rest of the weekend recuperating.

Today however, I've been very busy. My mom threw a Fat Wrap party.
I'm pretty sure they're called something else, but for lack of a better term, I'm referring to them as Fat Wraps. The way it works is, you're supposed to pick a place on your body that you'd like to wrap; the wraps themselves have some sort of herbal concoction that's supposed to detox your body and break down the fat cells in that particular area, resulting in losing a few inches off said area.
I wasn't particularly interested in the whole losing inches part, I'm quite fond of my body the way it is. In fact, I wasn't going to do one at all until I heard about the detox part. So, I figured, "What the hell" and went for it. So I, along with everyone else at the party, was measured and then had my stomach all wrapped up for the forty-five minutes until it was time to re-measure. Everyone lost a few inches...everyone except ME. Now, I'm not concerned with my stomach they way it is, but that definitely doesn't mean I want to gain anything in that general area. My butt, yes. My stomach, NO. I was the only person that gained.
I got what's called a "toxic bloat". Of course. Just my luck. Apparently, you're not really supposed to do one of these Fat Wraps while on your period. Something that wasn't mentioned to me until after the fact.